How To Leave Lasting Impacts On People

When you tactfully break social norms, you leave a lasting impact on people.

👊 The Punch List:

• 99% of people’s interactions are boring and uneventful.

• Impactful interactions can increase likeability, build rapport, and create more social opportunity.

• Tactfully breaking social norms leads to memorable interactions.

• The line between impactful versus awkward interactions is thin.

3 Tips for Impactful Interactions

Skip the small talk

This works because most conversations are repetitive and predictable. When someone skips the awkward, boring questions it creates space for more interesting convos. People will be less likely to get drained and zone out of conversation if you skip the small talk.

In the real world you can simply join conversations that are passed the small talk phase. Or you can keep a list of your favorite weekly topics and start new convos there. Another trick is turning small talk into deeper convos with good follow up questions.

Examples to skip small talk is following up any topic or point with, ”How does that make you feel? Really?”.

Ask unexpected questions

This works because most conversations are navigated in a zoned out autopilot state. Similar to when you’re driving but later don’t remember details of the trip, we conversate without trying. When you ask an unexpected question like, “what did you eat for breakfast?”, the person has to actively think.

In the real world you can ask questions that you’re wondering but usually don’t share. (as long as it’s not offensive) The random questions will get some surprising reactions from people but it will always make them engage. The more childlike the question or thinking, the better people respond.

Examples of good unexpected questions are, “What did you want to be as a child?”, “What’s your go to show right now?” or “Would you rather invisibility or flying?”

Break the touch barrier

This works because we normally only touch people we trust and our close with. So when you break the touch barrier it tells the subconscious, “I’m friendly with this person, and I trust them.” The key here is to be subtle, respectful, and tactful.

In the real world you should touch people in places that are acceptable for a stranger to touch. So a back tap, a hug, or a fist bump. These are all great ways to break the touch barrier without breaching personal boundaries. And remember in the real world, less is more.

Examples of breaking the touch barrier are a fist bump to introduce, a light shoulder bump when laughing together at a joke, or just a closing handshake.

Overall everyone is different so there’s no perfect system for every interaction with people. The best strategy for being memorable with other people is showing what makes you different. For us WIPs, that’s the projects we’re building and the progress we’re making. That’s what makes us unique and not clones.

And the more individuality we show, the more lasting impact we leave on people.

So anytime you meet someone new, be different, break the norms, and show your individuality.

In progress,

Tim

P.S.- This post is a banger 😉…